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Jedi Leadership trick

Episode 34: Disown Others’ Emotions, A Jedi Leadership Trick [The Amiel Show]

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Just as other people are not responsible for your emotions, you are not responsible for theirs.

That’s the good news.

The bad news is that you likely act as though you are.

It happens every day. Someone on your team is angry they were passed over for a promotion. Your peer glares at you when you don’t have their back in a meeting. Your spouse gives you that “look” because you’re late for dinner again.

About one tenth of a second later, you feel the impact in your body. “Oh crap,” you think to yourself. “I just pissed her off.”

Nice thought. But you’re wrong.

You can’t piss someone off. It’s not in your power. The person who is angry generated that emotion herself. She is responsible for the emotion. Not you.

And once you embody this understanding, your life will never be the same again.

So it’s time to stop taking responsibility for what is not rightly yours. It’s time to disown others’ emotions.

That’s the name of this Jedi Leadership Trick and the theme of this 10-minute. Listen in.

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Episode 33: Own Your Own Emotions, A Jedi Leadership Trick [The Amiel Show]

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In this 15 minute episode, you will learn one of the keys to emotional mastery: taking responsibility for your own emotions.

Why is it unhelpful to you and others to blame them for how you are feeling?

What changes when you start taking responsibility for your emotions?

Listen in as I answer these questions and describe the five levels of competence of owning your own emotions.

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Episode 30: The Triple Perspective Combo, A Jedi Leadership Trick [The Amiel Show]

Episode 30: The Triple Perspective Combo, A Jedi Leadership Trick [The Amiel Show]

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This Jedi Leadership Trick is for complex situations where seeing things from a single perspective won’t cut it.

Example: senior leaders in your organization make a decision and ask you to “communicate the message to your team.”

You’re preparing to meet with one person on the team, and you know she won’t be pleased by what she hears. You want to be loyal to senior leaders yet are concerned about the impact on her. And you’re not sure how you feel about it yourself. What do you do?

Listen in as I describe:

  • The three default moves many of us make in this situation–and the risks of each
  • Why it’s important that your response embrace not one, not two, but three different perspectives
  • The three steps you can take to embrace this complex situation with greater skill and less stress

the-triple-perspective-combo

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You can view (and then download) a complete, word-for-word transcript of this episode here.

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Episode 29: The 5-Point Relationship Health Scale, A Jedi Leadership Trick [The Amiel Show]

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In this 6-minute episode, I introduce a Jedi Leadership Trick called The 5-Point Relationship Health Scale. You can use it to:

  • Rate your important relationships at work (and in the rest of life) using my “patented” 5-point relationship health scale
  • Identify which of these relationships  are truly pivotal
  • Identify what an improved relationship looks like

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Episode 26: Help Me Understand, A Jedi Leadership Trick [The Amiel Show]

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Ready for a very short, very practical episode of The Amiel Show?

Last week, before my interview with Pamela Weiss, I introduced a new feature to the podcast: The Jedi Leadership Trick. It’s ten minutes or less of practical wisdom you can put into action immediately. We looked at one called Two Feet, Five Breaths.

This week, let’s try something different. The Jedi Leadership Trick is the episode.

I call this one Help Me Understand. Have a listen!

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READ: Episode 29: The 5-Point Relationship Health Scale, A Jedi Leadership Trick [The Amiel Show]